The Pretenders, The Pretenders

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What do you get when you cross Wire-like guitars, Clash-style aggression, Kinks-esque pop sensibility, a pair of heroin addicts and a midwest girl who wants to rock (and fuck) just like the boys?

You get the self-titled debut from The Pretenders.

Released in 1980, The Pretenders is a mixture of punk, rock and new wave; bridging the past to the future. Distinctly divided into two halves (remnants of the pre-CD days), side one is where Chrissie Hynde and the boys (guitarist James Honeyman-Scott, bassist Pete Farndon and drummer Martin Chambers) rip through the first seven (of 12) tracks.

Everyone from The PIxies to Bikini Kill took notes from this album, cribbing Hynde's disjointed/angry young woman lyrics and swiping Honeyman-Scott's sonic play on guitar.

"Precious" is a big piss-off to her old hometown Akron, and a brilliant opening song. One that allows her to drop both the S & F-bombs, a rarity for a major label release from the early 80s. LeBron James should have taken note; this is the way to tell off your home, not by saying 'I'm taking my talents to South Beach.'

"Tattooed Love Boys" is a bomb burst, in 7/16 time (yeah, try counting that out), about a fast girl all grown up. "Space Invader" is the ubiquitous instrumental that all albums of the late 70s/early 80s had with the second best bass/drum groove on the album.

Side 1 ends with "Stop Your Sobbing", the Nick Lowe-produced, Ray Davies number, that was the worlds introduction to the Pretenders. Released almost a year earlier as a single it climbed into the British Top 40.

The other side of the album is where the Pretenders really stretch their legs and expand upon the aggressiveness of side one. Three of the five tracks run over 5:20, where as side one had only one track longer than 3:40.

"Kid" opens side two and has the distinction of being one of the shortest song titles in rock history. The driving beat and surf-like guitars make it a perfect song for the open road with the top down. "Brass In Pocket" fulfills all the requirements of the ultimate pop song, hooks aplenty, a running time under 3:00 and just enough sexual innuendo in the lyrics to demand one to sing along.

The album ends with her take on fame, "Mystery Achievement". One of the top 3 drum/bass intros in all of rock history, its Honeyman-Scott's guitar that keeps the song from becoming too one-dimensional. From the slashing Beatles chords in the beginning over the beat, to the frantic solo, to the rising, spinning way he ends the song, its all perfect, and a great way to end a fantastic debut album.

The Pretenders would not have another album half as good as this in their future, but were able to have a string of hit singles for more than two decades, and allowed Chrissie to open all sorts of doors for female-led rock bands.

This is a disc that should not be missed by anyone and is in my Top 25 of all time.

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